When I worked in Milton Keynes I would take the short journey from Junction 12 to Junction 13 of the M1 Motorway to enter the northern part of the town. However, as I drove those few miles I would often wonder what if I didn’t turn off at Junction 13? What if I just kept driving up the M1? Where would I end up? Where would I like to go to? Perhaps I could go walking in the Peak District, or visit a friend somewhere or even end up in Scotland? I knew that those journeys would need to wait for another time, but it was tempting all the same. Some times we just want to explore something new.
The word ‘journey’ is frequently used as a metaphor for our life and so songs involving journeys are also common. Vaughn Williams wrote a whole song cycle entitled ‘Songs of Travel’ with words by Robert Louis Stevenson. The first song is called ‘The Vagabond’. The song starts with a trudging, footstep-like piano accompaniment. The words of the song are a life view of a nomadic, solitary traveller who journeys from place to place with no fixed abode or responsibilities. He survives only on what nature and humanity offer and what work he can find on the way. ‘Bed in the bush with stars to see, bread I dip in the river. There’s the life for a man like me. There’s the life forever.’ Although a romantic idea, this type of journey rarely exists in real life and certainly lacks direction. There is also a sense that by the end of the song cycle the traveller has missed out on important aspects of his life because of the choices he has made. All journeys involve making choices and choosing a direction. Sometimes we make the wrong choices and must suffer the consequences. Our journey can become stuck or blocked and then we must re-evaluate and find a way forward.
As I ponder my own life journeys I know that some have been good but there have also been some quite painful and bruising ones. Some of my life journeys I thought I had a plan for, and some I learned didn’t have any plan. Some I certainly wouldn’t have chosen if I could have avoided them. There have been journeys in my relationships. Like many I have fallen in love and then gone through a painful divorce. Thankfully I was able to fall in love again and find a deeper, stronger and lasting relationship. There has been the experience of having my two older daughters and then trying to maintain a relationship with them when our family split up. My wife and I have also experienced the journey of adoption and all that comes with this. This is a whole story in itself. There have of course been exciting journeys too. I have been a professional musician for 35 years and experienced many trips travelling around the world, even if I didn’t always have time to appreciate it.
All journeys are different. Some are bumpy. Some take longer than others. Some are through beautiful scenery and others are very dull. Sometimes I have thought that I was travelling in the right direction only to find that I was infact lost. In life, these are the times when I have sought help from others. In retrospect I have learned that some of the more painful journeys have led to the greatest personal growth.
In this last year I have also had the fascinating journey of becoming a coach. One of the things I have loved most about this is hearing about other people’s journeys and helping them find their way. I love listening to people and seeing how they find their own solutions to life’s blocks. I am always amazed at how talented, resourceful and creative they can be. Whether it involves moving forwards in their careers or helping them to find their inner confidence to take their next journey, it is always a privilege to work with my clients.
No doubt I still have many more personal journeys to take. There is definitely a small part of me that wants to be that romantic nomad, living in a caravan and travelling to new places but staying as long as I want when I have found somewhere that I feel settled. Although the ‘bed in the bush’ is definitely not me. I love our cosy, portable little home that we can pull to anywhere in the country. Unlike the vagabond I still need part of home with me. Travelling with a caravan does of course mean that you can’t travel as fast from A to B as others on that motorway, but life is not always about getting to our destination quickly. Sometimes it is about taking things slower and enjoying the journey on the way. There’s the life for a man like me!